My First 50 Pounds

100 pounds of flour

   My first sack of high gluten flour that weighed in at 50 lbs, is nearly gone. I reached for the heavy bag in the pantry and fumbled through all these nearly empty bags of flour rolled down to the size of a Sunday paper in the Rubbermaid bin and tried to pull out the heaviest. When I came up nearly empty-handed I checked the printing on the outside of the nearly-empty bag.  It read High Gluten flour and down below it said, "50 lbs." I was shocked and amazed that I had almost used it all. For a pizzeria that wouldn't have been unusual. For a home hobby chef I was impressed. Wow, I thought, I used all that flour making pizzas in a 9 month period?  For less than $20 I was able to devour the contents by turning it all into pizza.
    When carrying in a 50 pound bag of flour from the car I had to wonder if I went overboard and just bought it because it was cheap and available. To put that question to rest, I saw that my interest in pizza was a little more than a hobby.  50 pound bags of flour are heavy to lift, move around and store. When I look into the container that holds 50 pounds of Presley's dry dog food I can never imagine him eating through all that kibble. I never ask him to save me the last bite of his dog food either nor would he give it up to me, but it's funny how he appreciates the last bite of our pizza and expects it as well.

How do they know the last bite is for them?

    It seemed absurd to buy that much flour for two people since we're not putting it in storage for Armageddon. However, I have to remind myself from time to time that I am the son of a man that has 8 to 10 gallons of paint thinner in his shed, more portable radios than Radio Shack and enough flashlights to recreate a solar flare. In his home you wouldn't have to turn your head more than 15 degrees right or left to see what time it was due to the vast number of clocks he has collected over the years and all set to within micro seconds of each other as if it were the control room at an underground nuclear missile site. So, with that in mind, I suppose a 25 lb. bag of A.P. flour, 25 pounds of bread flour and 50 pounds of high gluten flour seems reasonable.  Did I mention another 10 pounds of semolina flour as well?
   Maybe I should build myself a dry goods storage shed like the pioneers used to have out on the prairie.  No, probably not, but I think the downstairs shower that we refer to as the auxiliary pantry works out well. The glass door seals it from any would-be mice invaders. I wrap the bags of flour in plastic bags to keep any would-be pantry moths and moisture out of it and store it in a large Rubbermaid airtight container to keep any of the would-be ant invaders out. I keep my available cash in a drawer but my pizza flour is triple wrapped and secured. It makes me wonder too... but how would you explain to this soulful dog that there is no pizza in the house?